Showing posts with label Iman. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Iman. Show all posts

Saturday, January 08, 2022

Dear David Bowie

by Dick Mac

Good morning, sailor!

Each time I type that I think of the childhood tune that seemed so risqué: “What do you do with a drunken sailor early in the morning?” What do you do with a drunken sailor? Remember drinking!  My goodness, what decades the 70s and 80s were.  Remember?  No . . . me neither, really.  But there are some memories, of course.

One night in the mid-1970s, I was home with my mother, which didn’t happen much at that time. I was going to watch the Grammys instead of sneaking into 1270 or The Other Side, places where a queer minor could drink and dance. I was never an awards show person, but you were going to be on, so I stayed home.  My mother said: “Oh, he sings that ch-ch-ch-ch song that I like,” and she decided to join me in front of the television.  Finally, you appeared on screen and she gasped.  “Oh my God!” She exclaimed. “What’s wrong with him? Is he sick? He looks dead!”

Well . . . you weren’t dead yet, but you looked pretty fucked-up! You were dressed impeccably, of course, but you weighed nothing and looked like you could just fold-up and expire at any moment. I think I remember you saying that you have little or no memory of that appearance. I believe it! You were a mess!

Anyway . . . that’s my seventies memory for today.

It’s your birthday again, and you still haven’t responded to my last five letters. Not an email, not a chat, nothing. I miss you.

There is no good news to share about the state of your city. This damned pandemic is still spreading, as we return to millions dead in the streets this Winter.  I’m certain you’d be up in the mountains if you were still in New York.  I assume you know that Iman sold the apartment and spends her time in Ulster County. You may not have sold the apartment, but I suspect you wouldn’t have been in the city the last two years.

Last night The Cutting Room hosted a David Bowie Tribute with a bunch of our favorite musicians and performers. We were supposed to go, but because of this damned virus we cancelled. We were supposed to be driving to Philadelphia at this moment for a tribute show there tonight; but pricessramsey is in Cleveland, and cavebat is in Riverdale, and shakeh is in Philadelphia, and helen2 is in Inwood, and I am in Brooklyn. We are not getting together to celebrate in person.

Yeah, we wanted to celebrate your diamond anniversary!  It’s today!  Your Diamond Anniversary! It sounds so elegant! Not elegant in an actual elegant way, sort of in that tacky elegance that diamonds represent. Still, it is a big deal. Seventy-five!

I didn’t see many people last year. I saw Tony a couple of times, and he seems well. Then the usual suspects, but no visitors from Europe, and no sleep-overs, and little travel.

A lot happened with you in this past year: the next career-spanning boxed set was released. “Brilliant Adventure” includes Black Tie, White Noise, Buddha of Suburbia, 1.Outside, Earthling, and hours… along with some outtakes, B-sides, and live recordings. I got the vinyl box from one of our mutual friends and it’s remarkable to get that many David Bowie records in one package.

They released “Toy”! Yup! It was finally released. Twenty years ago, the cool kids made sure I got a copy, so I’ve had those songs in rotation for a long time; but, most Bowie fans haven’t had those cuts.  I never understood why it wasn’t released.  Maybe you refused to give yourself permission to release your songs.  I guess that could happen in some weird legal situations with publishing rights and all that stuff I only pretend to understand.  Be that as it may, it’s been released.  I got the vinyl box set, which is six 10” records. Very fun!  Lovely package.  I think you’d have approved.  Maybe not!

It was announced that they are making a new version of Labyrinth.  I assume they will use new music, so it will have no relation to your version of the movie. I don’t even really think of this new project as having any relation to you beyond the obvious fact that you appeared in a version of it 35 years ago.  It’s like pretending Judy Garland and Janet Gaynor are somehow connected because they both made “A Star Is Born”! There is no connection; but people need to connect things.

Speaking of “The Star Is Born” movie, I had a fun thing come across my screen this year. About ten or 12 years ago, I was at a gathering at an apartment in  the Village. The host had a new boyfriend and he was the most tedious quean you could imagine, a total dullard. Not untalented or stupid, but boorish (and boring).  Anyway, he adored Lady Gaga, and we were talking about her songs and stardom. There was a unanimous feeling that she was a big star and had some good pop songs. Mostly we talked about her influence on young queer/gay/trans people and how important her message of acceptance was to the marginalized. You remember! She really was on the vanguard of the next phase of human acceptance. Then we talked about her influences and this tedious queen mentioned Freddie Mercury, and we all agreed about his influence on her act. Then I mentioned you, and her statements that you were a huge influence on her, and this quean says: “Oh, please! David Bowie is awful. He had no influence on her at all.” There was a bit of stunned silence in the room, some nervous giggles as he ranted and raved about her. That was the end of the conversation and I didn’t think about it again. I’m not a follower of hers, and it doesn’t really matter to me what that dullard thinks of you. Then a few months ago, a picture appeared on my screen of Lady Gaga wearing a backless gown, showing lots of tattoos, and right there on her side is a tattoo of the Aladdin Sane album cover. So . . . smart people know you’ve influenced everybody, and dullards are . . . well . . . dull.

I got a new job. It’s weird to start a job during a pandemic when you don’t actually see anyone in person. It is what it is!

Leah released Stylophonika, a very cool LP with the Kingston University Stylophone Orchestra, recorded at the Visconti Studio. Speaking of Leah, she has also written the book Blackstar Theory, The Last Works of David Bowie that will be published this year. She is brilliant! Did you ever meet her?

What else happened since we last talked? We made Juneteenth a national holiday!  Yeah!  Can you believe it?!?!? The Duke and Duchess of Sussex left royal life and moved to Southern California. He is Diana’s son, and she is an American he married a few years ago. A fantastic multi-part documentary about The Beatles was released.  I loved it. There’s a great scene of Paul jamming with John and Yoko, that totally demystifies and dismisses tall tales about their relationships. The weather has gotten crazy, but I know you didn’t really let the daily weather affect you (smart people don’t complain about weather); the issue has really been about climate change.  It’s gotten a bit out-of-hand. So far, there is no life on Mars, but we’ve got vehicles up there still driving around and sending back pictures and collecting samples. It looks like we might actually send people there some day.

A bunch of people died. Some of them you knew, and some of them might already be on your list for heavenly tea: Mick Rock, Wanda Young, Joan Didion, Kangol Kid, Bell Hooks, Michael Nesmith, Lina Wertmüller, Stephen Sondheim, Jean-Paul Belmondo, Charlie Watts, Chuck Close, Hiro, Biz Markie, Bunny Wailer, Chick Corea, Larry Flynt, Christopher Plummer, Phil Spector, and another doll, Sylvain Sylvain. Keep an eye open for them. I’m sure there are some fun conversations to be had among that crowd.

Do they play music where you are?  Do you ever get-together with other rock gods and jam? Do they all make you sing “Heroes”?  I wish I could see you sing “Heroes” again.  Hell, I’d settle for seeing you sing “Hickory Dickory Dock”!

We are supposed to go to England in March for a Holy Holy tour, but last night we concluded that we are not going to be traveling in March.  There’s a big Bowie Convention in Liverpool in June.  We have fancy tickets for that, but we don’t have travel plans yet. Nobody knows if it will be safe to travel then.  I am leery, but not closed-minded.

Tonight, Mike Garson is hosting an online David Bowie tribute concert.  We will be watching.  Last year it was fun so we hope for the same this year. Sure wish you could join us.

I guess that’s it . . .

When you have a moment, open the window and holler down the road to me, like you used to do. I miss that.

Remember . . . you can always come home and we can do all the old things!

Happy birthday, old man.

Everyone says Hi!


Thursday, August 16, 2007

Atta Boy, Beckham!

Last night, David Beckham started his first match for his new team, the Los Angeles Galaxy, of Major League Soccer (MLS). He had appeared previously, but because of a nagging ankle injury picked-up in Madrid earlier in the year, he had yet to start a match.

I am a fan of David Beckham, Becks, David Spice, Spice Boy, whatever you want to call him. He is a real star. He is good at what he does, he makes himself available to his fans, he's enthusiastic about his craft, and he's on top of his game from every angle. He's sort of the David Bowie of sports. Always on.

Beckham endeared himself to me even more deeply in the eighteenth minute of last night's match when he committed a hard foul against DC United's Jaime Moreno, the polar opposite of Beckham, a loathsome, self-serving athlete who deserves (and generally gets) no accolades. Atta boy, Beckham! Keep after that pile of shit and take him out at every opportunity!

Vitoria Beckham (née Adams), also known professionally as Posh Spice, was present, of course. She is the perfect star's wife: famous herself, very stylish, funny, accessible to the media, and just aloof enough to keep us guessing. Hardly the Iman of sports, but entertaining and appropriate nonetheless. (Is Iman technically Iman Bowie? I think not. But she is another perfect superstar-wife.)

The L.A. Galaxy have been plagued by injuries this season and the team is filled with athletes too awful to watch on a regular basis, including (but not limited to) Landon Donovan and Cobi Jones. I find each of those men so dislike-able that it is difficult to watch the team play. But, watch them I must because they play my team, Red Bull New York, at least twice a year.

And I am such a soccer slut that I watch at least two other MLS matches on television each week in which my team is not participating. And since ESPN is so heavily involved in the Beckham Comes To America fleece-job, er promotion, the Galaxy seem to be featured in the game of the week every week now.

So, I see more of Landycakes and Cobi than I care to admit.

Beckham also scored his first goal as a member of the Galaxy last night, a perfect 26-yard free kick to put the Galaxy up 1-0. There was not as much pandemonium from the 17,223 spectators as I expected.

The Galaxy went on to beat the DC Scum, 2-0. Thank you, LA.

Beckham's return to play means quite a bit to me, because the Galaxy visit New York this weekend, well, technically they visit New Jersey to play my team. Over fifty-five thousand tickets have been sold. At inflated prices (double). His first start for the Galaxy is a good indication that Beckham will play against the Red Bulls.

The inflated ticket-prices have been a source of discussion in the media, because Beckham's failure to appear in previous matches has left a bad taste in the mouths of many consumers who bought expensive tickets to watch the Galaxy in other cities, only to have Beckham sit on the bench. Because I am a Red Bulls season-ticket holder, I did not have to pay extra for my seats. Whew! My seats aren't worth $60.00 apiece, anyhow, and that is what the front office charged for seats in my section for this match.

I have seen Beckham play once before, on the England national team, and I am excited about the prospect of seeing him play again. He is a joy to watch. And this time, I get an added bonus: I get to boo him!

That's right! David Beckham plays for LA, a team I hate almost as much as I hate DC and New England. LA has to lose this match. I am a New York supporter, and I will boo all the Galaxy players, no matter how famous or pretty.

The supporters club at the stadium creates chants for everyone to sing during the match. My favorite one for this Saturday will be used if Beckham sits on the bench. It is sung to the tune of "Frere Jacques":

David Beckham, David Beckham.
Can you play? Can you play?
What a shame you're sitting
You might as well be knitting!
That a girl! That a girl!


That chant has everything sports needs: derision of the opposing player and/or team and slightly misogynist overtones deriding the sex and/or sexual orientation of the opponent. Nothing terribly offensive, just a bit of a laugh!

I will applaud for him when he arrives on the field, and I will applaud for all the players when the match is completed. But every time that Galaxy wanker touches the ball, I will boo. I do not wish him any ill, I just hope he fails to score and I hope his team loses.

Is that wishing him ill? Maybe it is.

I will be nice to his wife though! I wouldn't boo her!

Congratulations Becks on your first start and your first goal! Here's to many more of both!


Dick Mac Recommends:

Bend It Like Beckham
Imran Ali, Ameet Chana


Beckham
David Beckham