I Loves Me Some Red Bulls

by Dick Mac

Well, not the drink Red Bull, but the soccer team owned by the drink company.  There are some (and have been other) amazing players in the organization.  I've been a fan for 12 years, and a season ticket holder for most of that time.  I am dedicated.  No matter how much the team wins or loses and no matter how badly the organization is mismanaged, I am always true to my team.

This does not mean I am incapable of critical analyses, it just means that my heart always wins out over actual scientific, empirical, legal, and historical analyses and conclusions.

Being a soccer fan in New York City is probably easier than being a soccer fan in Tulsa, or Missoula, or Birmingham, or Little Rock; but, being a soccer fan in the United States means truly being a second-class sports citizen.  OK, third-class.  Hockey fans get the #2 slot.

I am lucky, though.  I live in a large metropolitan area with one or the known-universe's most dynamic urban centers.  There are a lot of soccer fans.

My team built a state-of-the-art soccer-specific stadium in Harrison, New Jersey.  Harrison is right across the Passaic River from Newark.  It's a beautiful stadium.  European fans and players alike are happy to wax eloquently about its beauty and utility.  It really is the premier soccer venue in the Americas.  I have been fortunate to have four or five tours of the place over the course of time from the construction phase (seats were not even in, yet, never mind offices, locker rooms and the such) through to last year's annual behind-the-scenes tour with my daughter.

The organization works very hard to win over the hearts and minds (and future pocketbooks) of the area's children.  There have been events and special clubs and access to the players for kids, and every time they do something like that, the amount goodwill they enjoy is enormous. What parent isn't happy to see a child beaming with pleasure while meeting one of the players on the team, have a picture taken, and collecting an autograph.  Every parent is thrilled to see that, it's priceless, and MLS teams work hard to make those moments happen.

My daughter is in her sixth year as a season-ticket holder, and to my surprise, her interest has not waned as she has matured.  We are members of Viking Army, an official supporters club, and she is well-known in that group as well as in the team's organization and fan base, in general.  She knows the chants and sings along, and at 9-years-old is still embarrassed by the R-rated (and X-rated) chants that emanate from the South Ward (home of the most ardent supporters).  We now travel to away matches with other supporters.  We've been to New England, Philadelphia, and Washington, DC.  On the road trips, she is totally comfortable socializing with the adults around her, because the men and women who make up the community of Red Bull supporters are a unique and amazing brand of people.  Soccer fans are different, they really are.

Because we are so familiar with the organization, the stadium, the other fans, and the surrounding area, our trips to Red Bull Arena are always fun.  This was not always the case.  The team has had some difficult hurdles to overcome since the facility opened for the 2010 season.

The stadium is located in a reclaimed industrial wasteland, and is part of a major development project that is seeing the riverfront of Harrison, New Jersey, transformed from an abandoned horror show, to a dynamic area of shopping and residences and entertainment, including Red Bull Arena.  The Riverfront project is impressive, and Red Bull inherited the project when they purchased the team a few years earlier.

In 2008, you may recall, the American economy took a turn for the worse, and the rest of the world followed.  Credit dried up, progress seemed to halt, and the entire planet seemed inert.

When you are redeveloping an industrial wasteland into an urban paradise, it is (generally speaking) a high-risk proposition.  High-risk proposals often face difficulty when seeking financing.  Needless to say, as the stadium was nearing completion and the bottom was falling out of the economy, almost all work on the rest of the project slowed to a standstill.  As an economist friend said to me a few years ago:  "Even China won't lend them money for that project, and when China won't lend you money you are probably in a bit of trouble."

Twenty-four acres of land that front the stadium were intended to be a mixed-use development with restaurants and bars and retail outlets and apartments and a cinema.  The local commuter rail station was to be transformed into a modern facility that provided multiple exits giving access to all of the new development, including the stadium.

Sadly, although work has re-started on some of the development, neither the fancy mixed-use development fronting the stadium, nor the promised transportation improvements have materialized.

Still we march on.  Literally.  Hundreds of us  march to the stadium as a group, before each match, and the players from both teams take the field in a procession that seems part-religious and part-militaristic.  We march on.

The team has trouble selling tickets.  The stadium seats 25,000 and I think only one Red Bulls match has sold-out:  and that was actually the MLS All-star game.  Our league matches do not sell-out. Sometimes, on a lovely day in the Spring, the stadium will be less than half-full.  The players, especially the famous players who have come from playing in European leagues, say it is discouraging to play in front of so few people.

But, we make a lot of noise!  And the players:  from the most famous, aloof, international to the most humble young man who has made good and landed a place on his hometown MLS team, acknowledge the support that the season ticket holders bring.  And they publicly applaud us.  Literally.  At the end of each match, they approach the South Ward, which is usually full, and clap their hands and wave to us.  They show their gratitude, and that is not something you see in any other American sports league.

I'm in love.  I love my Red Bulls.

I have written about the team many times, so a regular reader probably knows that my all-time favorite athlete, Thierry Henry, signed a four-year contract with us a few years back.  I get to watch my favorite player, one of the greatest players in the history of the sport, play at my stadium.  He has approached the section in which I sit and he has applauded me and my fellow fans.  When participating in a public event that includes face time with his fans, he is humble and self-deprecating, enthusiastic, sincere, and seems truly grateful for his success and station in life.  I am really lucky to have him on my team, to have met him and chatted a few minutes, had my picture taken with him, and get to brag over and over and over again about him being on my team.

My daughter tells a funny story about the first time we met Henry.  I was speechless, tongue-tied.  I had reverted to being a shy 9-year-old boy too nervous to talk in front of the grown-ups.  He talked with my daughter and asked her questions.  He signed a shirt on which she was collecting all the players' autographs. He posed for pictures with us.  And I stood there grinning like a fool, unable and incapable of knowing what to do or say.  I was so baffled and overcome, that I forgot to have him sign my Thierry Henry jersey.

At some later date, we attended an event at the SoHo Adidas shop with all the players.  Henry was present. I was less flummoxed this time, and was able to actually make sentences and laugh a few times.  As we were walking to meet another player, my daughter said (loudly enough for everyone to hear):  "Daddy, you forgot to have him sign your shirt again."  We managed to backtrack to his spot and my daughter explained to him that this was the second time I forgot to have him sign it.  We all laughed and I was (once again) a little boy trapped in an old man's body.

He isn't the only player that makes the team amazing.  Over the years, the organization has employed some wonderful players who have been very generous of time and spirit.  Currently, Henry plays with Tim Cahill, an Australian international, and Juninho, a Brazilian international.  Ten years ago, it was unthinkable that players of their stature, still fit enough to actually play the game, would play for us.   But here they are.

At one point, we had Henry, Rafa Marquez, and Juan Pablo Angel all on our team at the same time.  Outside of Europe it is almost unfathomable that a team would have three players of their stature on the roster -- irrespective of their current skill level.

As I said earlier, the players (especially the famous players) find it difficult to accept the lack of interest in the sport and the low attendance.  No matter how full, or not full, the stadium is for any particular match, it is like being in heaven to watch my team play, and to shout encouragement and sing the songs and chant the chants.

It is heaven inside Red Bull Arena.

Yes, it is hell outside the stadium, but once inside there are no words to describe the experience.

If you haven't been to a match at Red Bull Arena, please do so.  You will not regret it.  If you went once and were frustrated by the conditions surrounding the stadium, please give it another chance.  Things have improved and continue to improve, and you won't regret it!  Tickets are very affordable:  Look here.

Perhaps the surrounding development will be completed one day, maybe not.  But I won't let that stop me from attending every home match (and some away matches, too).

Noro-what?

by Dick Mac

How the hell do these things happen?

Or, in more realistic terms:  "Why me?"

I am having an encounter with noroviruses.

Sounds deadly and obscure, but noroviruses are commonly known as stomach viruses.

At the New York City Department of health website, it states:

Noroviruses are a group of viruses that cause an illness some people call the "stomach flu."  They are not related to the flu (influenza).  Another name for noroviruses is  gastroenteritis.

Noroviruses ("Stomach Virus")

Gastoenteritis!?!?!  I thought that was severe or chronic heartburn?  Yes, I do have heartburn with this, but it's all the other flu-like symptoms that make it unpleasant.  Especially the nausea.  So, I have all the symptoms of the flu, but I don't have the flu.  I have a stomach virus.

It has been at least five days and I am done with it.  I felt better yesterday and ate dinner last night.  Sadly, last night's dinner was not a permanent resident of my digestive system.  I felt better when I awoke, though, and got ready for work.

Not so fast!  Showering seemed simple enough, but moving around after the shower resulted in more nausea.

Now I am back in my pajamas, whining about being sick.

I am so done with this, so very done with this.

Dear David Bowie

And so you're back from outer space.
I just walked in to find you here with that sad look upon your face.
I should have changed that stupid lock,
I should have made you leave your key,
If I'd known for just one second you'd be back to bother me.

"I Will Survive" written by Freddie Perren and Dino Fekaris, performed by Gloria Gaynor (1979)

by Dick Mac

Dear David:

Welcome back!

I thought you'd never return.

I loved Tuesday's headlines:  "David Bowie Returns After Ten Years In Outer Space"!

How was outer space?

The last couple years of being a David Bowie fan have been lonely without you, but somewhat amusing.  Pictures of you walking with a shopping bag appeared.  I was particularly fond of the shot where you were discreetly flipping the bird to the photographer.

God knows you've given all of us enough memories to last a lifetime.

I had resigned myself to your retirement.

In the ten years since you've been gone, a lot has changed:

This internet thing (that you leveraged so successfully in the last century) is huge and is now even in grade school classrooms.  I know people who get all their television, movies and phone calls over the internet.  Well, I guess I do - but I still like the old way of doing those things, too.   Do you still have that Betamax?

And mobile phones!   Have you seen them?  Amazing what they do now.  I'll bet at least ten thousand views of your new video have been on a mobile phone.  Really!  Grown people hunched over a tiny 4" screen with the sound delivered through ear buds.  The sound and picture quality are amazing.  If they didn't have these in the part of outer space you were visiting, I suggest you check them out.

My wife and I had a daughter, shortly after the Reality show at Madison Square Garden.  Did you select Macy Gray as the opening act?  I adore her work (and I love her mental state, too).

After that show, I wrote:  "His conversations with the audience were animated and humorous. He was frisky, and sexy, and flirtatious. He was butch and femme, cowboy and drag queen, a little bit street and a little bit regal. He's a man's man and a big queen!"  I stand by that.  And I've missed you.

And now you've returned with that sad look upon your face.

In 2007, I arrived at my daughter's pre-school to pick her up.  They had had a music and dance session.  The teacher selected "The Jean Genie" and, according to the teacher, my daughter danced like a banshee and knew almost all the words to the song.  The teacher and I bonded that day: thanks to you.  Again!

The following year, I entered my daughter's room and she was listening to "Rebel, Rebel."  I cannot tell you how it feels (because I do not any words to describe it) to hear your toddler sing:  " . . . you've got your queue line and a handful of 'ludes . . . "!

I panicked, I interrupted and said:  "No, Boo, the line is "queue line and a handful of food . . . '"!  Totally lame, I know, but I was in a panic and "food" seemed like a good substitute.

"No daddy," she explained in a serious and officious tone, "it's handful of 'LUDES."

I shrugged my shoulders, smiled inside and out, and decided it wasn't a big deal.

She's a huge Bowie fan, and if you do a show in NYC, I will do my utmost to get her there.

What else?  I changed jobs.  We bought a huge apartment in Brooklyn and no longer live in Manhattan.  It was hard to accept at first, but I quite like it now.  I received a medal from the Bishop of Brooklyn for my service to the community.  My brother, who said your Staten Island show was the best rock concert he had ever seen, became a grandfather.  Some people died.

Rex Ray (rexer) has become really famous (he even has a fan club on Facebook), and then Elizabeth (leeza) got married.  Myriam (mask) has done some big shows and her work continues.  Jim (floidoip) well  . . . he adored you and you let him title his book "Up The Hill Backwards" which was very generous of you.  I've only talked to Mark (blammo) a few times while you were gone.  What a great guy!  After decades of saying no, Helen (helen2) became an American, but you don't have to be afraid of her.  Kelly-Marie (kelmar) moved to Vegas.  Of course she did.

And now your back!

(c) Jimmy King

I am so happy to see you used that picture of you and Burroughs in a current photo.  In 1974, I got that issue of Rolling Stone and was flabbergasted by it.  I had no idea who William Burroughs was, but at 16, it was time to read him.  Thank you for that.  For awhile I had a similar picture of the two of you pinned to my wall.  Maybe it was a copy of that one.

The original Plastic Ono Band reformed (with Sean Lennon substituting for John) and did a couple shows.  Yoko has formed a new Plastic Ono Band.  The only weird part is that sometimes Sean  looks just like his father and it really shakes me up.  You should see Plastic Ono Band.  Really.  Lori (cavebat) and I sat in front of Danny DeVito when they performed for the Japan tsunami fundraiser.

Yeah, that happened, too, while you were away:  an earthquake in Japan caused a devastating tsunami.  Look for the footage, it's incredible!

New York got struck by a superstorm (sort of like a hurricane, but not named a hurricane to allow insurance companies to say there was no hurricane and blame all the damage on flooding - everyone is covered for a hurricane, but many do not have flood insurance).  Your neighborhood was blacked-out for quite a while.  But, we're New Yorkers! Storm?  It's only weather!

Where did you go?  Did you get BBC, CNN or Fox News out there?

What happened recently, in 2012, that might interest you?

Barack Obama was re-elected as President.  Does this mean he is also the second black President?

In Burma, Aung San Suu Kyi was elected in a landslide.

We Occupied Wall Street.  After a worldwide financial meltdown, protesters took to the streets all over the world to demand changes to the financial system.  They ignored us and the media pays little attention now that the police are finished beating the shit out of a bunch of young Americans.  It's embarrassing.  The laws of finance have been so rigged against the bottom of the food chain that hunger and homelessness are pervasive throughout the States.  The Occupied movement is trying to mobilize again.  Perhaps you could lend them some support (or give them some money).

The Arab Spring has lasted quite a few seasons now, and last year Syria really fell apart.  It's a mess.

London hosted the Olympics.  Queen Elizabeth II (yes, she is still alive) made a James Bond short movie with Daniel Craig.  It was charming.  It ended with her parachuting into the stadium.

Gay couples can now get married in many states.  You know, I think almost all couples are gay when they get married.  That's the perfect adjective for how couples feel and act at their wedding.  Gaiety is a nice thing.  Anyway, same-sex couples can get married in a lot of states now.

Members of Pussy Riot, a girl rock band in Russia, have been imprisoned for their political actions and ant-establishment stance.  Things are not good in Russia.

A new dance craze from Korea took over and the song is played everywhere.  Now that you've been back a few days, you've probably heard it.  It persists.

While you were floating in a tin can, as you do, wherever you went, we managed to land a vehicle on Mars.  The Mars Rover.  Pretty cool.

The President made a valiant effort to create a health care system so that there wouldn't be as many Americans with untreated illnesses.  The Democrats basically implemented the system the Republicans presented in 1994.  It was a bad plan in 1994, and it's just as bad as a Democratic plan in 2013.  But it's something, and perhaps the dialog can shift to finding a way to ensure health care for all Americans.

While you were travelling through space, a guy named Felix Baumgartner flew to the edge of space and jumped to Earth.  He jumped a long way.  It was amazing.

Yeah!  A lot's happened while you were gone.

Tony Visconti says that you worked on your new album for two years.  He's a good guy, Tony: kind, intelligent, and talented.  Did you like his book?  Yeah, he wrote a book while you were away.  It's really good.  He mentions you in a few places and you are in some of the pictures.

Two years!  That's a long time to keep something confidential.  There was a brief time a year-or-so ago, when a rumor surfaced that you were recording.  It faded away.

Tony said something about you being Adam Ant about not touring for the new record.  I didn't know you were Adam Ant.  Perhaps he meant that Adam Ant performs on the new record?  I don't know:  but everyone says your Adam Ant about not touring.  It's all so confusing.

I downloaded the single first thing Tuesday morning.  The "download" concept has been embraced and grown incredibly while you were away.  If you could figure out how to download physical objects, you'd be as acclaimed as Einstein.  Just get into your Thomas Newton mode and whip something up.  Did you know that I had a boyfriend named Thomas Newton?  Newton was actually his middle name, but when I started dating him, he wore a small pin on his jacket with your picture from the cover of Low: a picture of Thomas Newton.

Alicia Keys released a great song about New York, and then Jay-Z used it as the chorus for his next song.  Both are very good.  My team plays it after the match.  It's more fun to hear "Empire State of Mind" than yet another go-through of Frank Sinatra singing New York, New York."

I suggest you download the Alicia Keys record.  It's very good.  You can get it on iTunes.  Is your iTunes account under the name "sailor"?

Everybody misses sailor.

I've done my best to influence my daughter's musical taste.  She was listening mostly to kiddie songs, and Dusty Springfield became her first adult favorite.  I was relieved it wasn't Sting. One weekend I was watching my new "Live Aid" DVD.  She walked in and out, and always noted the guys she thought were cute.  I think the first to get the nod was Paul Weller, who performed early in the show.   Anyway, she wandered in one time just as your performance began.  You looked striking in those days:  that hair, those suits.  I forget which song you were singing when she asked, breathlessly - yes, really, breathlessly, with her hand on her heart - "Who's that?"

Phew!  What a relief.  You went right to the top of the list of her faves, and I told her some fun stories about going to your concerts.

She's growing-up, of course, and now her musical taste includes boy bands with adorable lead singers.  Make sure you check out the lead singer of the band One Direction.  I think he looks like a young David Johannsen and every time I see him I think:  "Put some make-up and a dress on that kid and you could re-launch the New York Dolls."

I told my daughter about Bowienet, too.  She knows many of my Bowienet friends her entire life, and they come to her birthday party each year.

Ahhhh, Bowienet.

Remember the beginning of Bowienet?  Before the discussion boards, when all we had was chat and news and email.  I made friends through Bowienet.  Good friends, lifelong friends.  Many thanks to you for Bowienet.  It kind of fizzled, but you should be proud of that site, the community it spawned, and the impact it had on the development of artists and the web.  You were the guy who started it.  Nobody did it as well.  Get it back up and running so we can all join again.

Now you're back from outer space.

The new song is hauntingly beautiful.  I like the video a lot.  I reserve judgment on the cover until the official release date; because, you've made-up things before and surprised everyone later.  Will you release another song before March?  If we still had Bowienet, you could release one just to us!  Feel free to send me a cut to the email address at this blog.  Or, my Yahoo account.

Facebook is sort of like your old discussion boards with more interactive media options.  It's very public, so people are always getting in trouble by saying something or posting a picture that nobody should see.  Maybe you were able to connect from outer space.  Can you connect to the web from outer space?  Are you a sailor on Facebook?

Soccer (football) is actually becoming popular in the States.  It's on mainstream television and there are like twenty teams in the league (MLS).  Thierry Henry (Yes!  THAT Thierry Henry!) plays for New York, and David Beckham played for Los Angeles.   Some big names are coming from Europe.  It's been exciting.

My daughter is a huge Red Bull New York supporter, and has been a season ticket holder for five years.  The upcoming season being her sixth.  Last season she went on her first away trips.  We traveled to see our team play in New England and Philadelphia. It was exciting.

If you want to go to a match, we can get tickets for you.  Just say the word and we'll go.  Bring your daughter.  I would say we should bring wives, but mine will only attend if Beckham is playing.  So, we'll do it with our kids.  I usually drive to the stadium, and it's nothing to swing by and collect you.  In fact, the gas station across the street from your downtown place is where I get gas in Manhattan on our way, if I've forgotten to get it in Brooklyn.  So, really, it's no bother to swing by and pick-up you guys.

How is outer space?

Did you go far?  I know there's a lot of trash circling Earth, the detritus of our space exploration.  Now and then a piece falls to Earth.  Remember the Devo song "Space Junk"?  Are there other planets that have made a mess of their world?  I've always envied your astronaut persona, with the space travel, and cool songs, and accolades.  You really are a cowboy out there!

Did you find any of your music in other places?

Someone in Europe published a list of your 23 studio studio albums, ranking them from best to worst.  That caused quite a stir on Facebook.  I decided to create the same list but in order of best cover art.  You can find it on my Facebook page.

Bowinetters have a group on Facebook,  Roger (RogInLA) started it and maintains it.  He has made an alphabetical list of Facebook users and their Bowienet names.   Lots of people are there, including some old friendly faces.  You should join us.

Ten years in outer space.  Nobody should be surprised.

Americans have gone bat-shit over guns.  You're a cowboy, so you know about these things.  Cowboys are always so respectful of their guns.  Most Americans with guns don't treat guns with the respect they deserve.  It's surprising how easy it is to get one.  As you may have suspected, most of the killings are in suburban and rural areas.  The crime rate in New York City keeps going down.  Thank God for cities, especially cities with strict gun laws!

Anyway, it's good to have you back.  I hope you'll do some interviews, maybe even a television appearance.  If you do a TV appearance, be certain to have blammo give you the list of attendees.  He knows whom to invite.

I know you are not going tour to promote the album, and I understand.  It's exhausting enough spending ten years traveling through space.

But, you're back!

If you do decide to do one show for us, please give us plenty of warning so folks can fly over from Europe (and other places).  It would be swell to see you at Roseland again.  Carnegie Hall is nice, too.  Just not the Garden, please.

Well . . . I guess that's it for now.

Welcome back.

Let me know if you need anything.

Is It An Apology Or An Excuse?

by Dick Mac
At the MLS website, Commissioner Don Garber attempts to apologize to Red Bull fans for his massive blunder.  So, in case the injury of stupidly falling out of the playoffs isn't enough for us, the Commissioner has decided to rub a little salt in the wound:

To: MLS Fans

I want to apologize to all of our fans who were impacted by our decision last night to postpone the New York Red Bulls v D.C. United playoff game at Red Bull Arena.  Many of you made great sacrifices to attend the game and we let you down.

Based on the weather forecasts earlier in the day, we believed that we could still play the game.  As you know, soccer is played in inclement weather and we have cancelled very few games in the history of the League.   In this case, however, we underestimated the severity of the storm and its effect on our ability to play, and ultimately the enormous impact it had on our fans who traveled to and from Red Bull Arena.

I have heard from many of you about our decision to wait until after the scheduled start time to postpone the game and I know that many of our fans believe that we should have made the decision earlier in the day or even the day before.  In retrospect, I wish we had.  Although I believe that our intent in trying to preserve the ability to play the match was well meaning, in the end we would have better served our clubs and our fans by making the decision earlier. 

I can’t change what happened, but I can acknowledge when we make mistakes, even if we were well intentioned.

All of us at Major League Soccer have worked hard to earn your trust and support.  You can count on us to continue to work tirelessly to retain it as we build the League. 

Thank you,
Don Garber, MLS Comissioner

Why his letter is addressed to "MLS Fans" is insulting enough, but the entire situation is much worse than this letter describes.  Garber's treatment of MLS supporters, in general, and Red Bull supporters, in particular, is remarkable.  This is my response:


Dear Commissioner Garber:

You know what, Mr. Commissioner   This is not enough.

In this letter, you qualify your apology by explaining that you were well-intentioned.  In case you are not fluent in English, or good manners, or basic etiquette: qualifying your apology means it is not an apology, it's an excuse.

You knew the weather forecast, you knew the team objected to hosting and playing the match, you knew that hard-working fools like me would attend.  I purchased four extra tickets to the match (meaning I had 6 tickets), I traveled by public transit to Newark and walked to Harrison, I sat in that frigid cold stadium until NINE O'CLOCK, I purchased a hundred dollars worth of new wool caps in the Bull Shop and I bought hot food.  I went the distance.  I did what fans do.

You didn't let us down, you endangered us, and now cavalierly excuse yourself.

I watched fellow fans volunteer to shovel:  climb down out of the stands and move a ton or more of snow off the grass.

I watched security keep people out of empty dry seats at the north sections of the stadium because their tickets were for seats covered in snow in the south sections of the stadium.  You could have moved everyone inside, or into those dry seats, but you worried about your personal image.  You shoveled a few feet of snow for the NBC cameras and then ran inside to figure out how to cover your ass.

You moved your precious MLS staff out of the elements, leaving the part-time security team in the snow to listen to the fans' anger when you made your spineless announcement to cancel the match because you say you were concerned about our safety - but you had made no effort to move us into the warmth the 90 minutes prior to your announcement.  People were angry:  people yelled at those underpaid men who cover your ass for a part-time job with no benefits.  You owe those security people an explanation and apology as much as you owe us or anyone else.  You should also give each of them a large cash bonus.  You don't deserve them, and they deserve better than you.

Commissioner Garber:  you continue to make bad choices, year after year after year.  League structure, league schedule, television deals, league rules; year after year after year, you fail.  I have been a season ticket holder for ten years.  If I hadn't already re-upped for next year, I may not be coming back.  Next season, any decision to use my tickets will be made by my 8-year-old daughter.  If she wants to go, we'll go; but there will not be a single day I say:  'Hey, Boo, let's go to Red Bull Arena!'  And if she doesn't want to re-up for 2014, we will be gone.

I spend over four hours and $30 in tolls and parking getting to and from Brooklyn and Red Bull Arena each match (on a nice day), on top of the cost of my season tickets.  You've probably never had to find parking at Red Bull Arena so you probably don't even know that the team owns a stadium in an industrial wasteland with no parking!  You have luxury accommodations inside Red Bull Arena so you probably don't know that there is nothing to do in the area if you arrive early enough to park and see kick-off.  Red Bull Arena is a failure, a debacle, and you are lucky to have as many apologists in the league, media, and fan base who pretend it's a wonderful place.

Have you ever seen this site?:  http://www.uslsoccer.com/standings/36407030.html

That link is to a league that is a much better deal for me, their officiating is just as good as the joke that is MLS officiating, and although they might not have Titi, they have talented hard-working players who are fun to watch. After this debacle, Mr. Commissioner, the Brooklyn Knights are a viable option for my family's entertainment dollars.  Not because we do not love the Red Bull players; but because you cannot be trusted as a leader, and the league and team cannot be trusted because they reflect your incompetence.

You do not have my trust:  I DO NOT TRUST YOU.  You as Commissioner no longer have my support.  As long as you remain an employee of MLS in any capacity, then the league will not have my support either.  I'm done, Mr. Commissioner.  I'm done with you.  Get out of the way and take your guys (your cronies) with you:  Mark Abbott, JoAnn Neale, Dan Courtemanche, Todd Durbin, Bill Ordower, Sean Prendergast, and especially Nelson Rodriguez, who (after you) is individually the hugest embarrassment to American capitalism in all of sport.  You and your team have failed!  A New York sports writer actually stated that if the NHL wasn't on strike, you would be the worst league in America!  He's correct!

You have failed.

Please go away now.

If you and your lot will go away, I will attend MLS matches. If you stay, it's unlikely I will be around much anymore.

Being A Good Neighbor

by Dick Mac


After dropping-off my wife and daughter to trick or treat in a non-religious (heathen) neighborhood, I drove around to look at the state of Superstorm Sandy's devastation in my general area.  (What the fuck is a superstorm?  I thought a hurricane was a superstorm!  Why isn't it just called Hurricane Sandy?)

I live in Midwood Brooklyn, near the Bensonhurst border.  The area is predominantly Jewish (orthodox), with a smattering of Italians and Latinos, and a lot of Koreans.  Then there is the occasional Catholic Leftist, like me.  OK, maybe there is only one of me.  It's pretty conservative.

I was looking at fallen trees and the corresponding damage, and stopped to talk to a few people who were cleaning up.  I am a people-person, as we used to say in the 1980s.  I like talking to neighbors and people in the community.  I like to know my neighbors.  Problem is that they generally do not want to know me!

One guy was older and was struggling to move big logs into a stack.  I parked and offered to give him a hand.  He had used a chainsaw to cut the trunk into pieces, but they were still a bit big.  He had extra gloves.

He explained that he had intended to take it down last Summer, but never got around to it.  We laughed about the mess and now he wouldn't have to pay to have it removed.  He would have done it himself, he explained.  It keeps him young.  DAMN!  He wasn't THAT much older than me!

A younger guy came out of the neighboring house and worked with us.  He had an Obama pin, an Occupy pin, and a marriage equality pin on his denim jacket, none of which I'd noticed until he got warm and took it off.  I wondered if the older guy had seen them, and hoped he hadn't.  It's not a big Obama neighborhood.

We got the job finished in about ten minutes and the guy offered us beers.  I passed, the other guy accepted.  I walked to my car and got a bottle of water. As the kid put on his jacket the older guy saw the Obama pin.

"God bless ya' kid," he said.  "Wearing that pin in this neighborhood."

Then it came out that the older guy was a lifelong Republican but had voted for Obama in 2008 and was planning to vote for him again in 2012.  I was careful to be reserved and measured in my response, but explained I voted Democrat in the Presidential race.  "You young guys are all Democrats!"

We all laughed.

It was better than being carded at the liquor store!  I mean, the guy wasn't ten years older than me.  No way was he 64!  We chatted about his tree and the weather, and I made my excuses.

A few blocks later, in a more affluent area, I drove past more houses with trees laying across the sidewalk and into the street.  I realized those must be the homes of elderly people who have no way to handle the problem.  There are a lot of retirees in this area, and snowbird season hasn't yet begun.

Then I saw it was true:  an elderly man was getting out of a car in front of his house, a big tree blocking his driveway.  He stood there looking at it in disgust.

I pulled over, got out and talked to him.  I figured I could help him move it far enough to get his car safely into the driveway.  We laughed about the perfect landing and he said he was lucky it hadn't hit his house or car (which he'd left on the street).  The car was very cool:  a dark blue vintage Lincoln - very nice, and the house was modest and well-kept.  There was a Romney sign in the window of his sun room.  

I asked if he wanted some help moving the tree:  did he have a chainsaw, or a big rope we could use to drag it.  He was not as fit as the previous guy.  He crinkled his face and shrugged his shoulders.  He told me about his son who lost everything in Jersey.  He was driving to Jersey tonight, so he didn't think moving the fallen tree would be worth all the trouble.  He offered me a drink.  I begged-off, saying I was driving and had to pick-up my family in a little while.

"If Obama hadn't destroyed America, city workers would have already removed this mess.  Nothing works anymore."  I got a bit nervous because I really didn't want to have this conversation, I just wanted to help.

"I'm happy to help move it," I said.

"Nah!  It's the city's job!  Let them move it."

I asked where his son lived.  I didn't recognize the town.

He asked if I'd seen Christie with Obama on television.  I said I had (even though I had only seen internet pictures).  He shook his head:  "Damned politicians will do anything to get re-elected."

I nodded.

"I used to like Christie," he explained.

I wanted to run away:  "He seems to be doing a good job for Jersey."  I was prepared to lie to escape this conversation.

"He was," the guy explained.  "Now he's chumming around with Obama."

Oddly, I felt like I was supposed to defend Chris Christie, whom I loathe.

"What can you do?"  I asked and shrugged my shoulders.  Damn, why did I ask a question!

"Vote for Romney," he explained to little old, naive me, who is wearing a CBGB hoodie (hood up).

I was frozen in my tracks and just nodded.  I was at a loss for words:  not a state in which I often find myself.  "Sure I can't help move this tree?" I asked again.  "I really don't mind."

He had worked himself-up to a rage.  I am familiar with this state - I do it to myself regularly.

"No!"  He said adamantly!  "Let's see how long it takes the city to move it."

I had no intention of following-up with him about it, and cringed inside when I heard myself ask:  "Have you called 311?"

"I don't believe in 311.  The government shouldn't be providing those kinds of services," he explained.  "We can't afford that shit."

"You can tell them there's a tree to be removed.  It might get it handled faster," I tried to reason.  What am I doing?

"If those idiots don't know there are trees down, my call to 311 isn't going to help them."

"Good point," I demurred.

"Sure you don't want a drink?"

"Nah!  I should get going.  Good luck with your son tonight."

"What?" he asked.  "Oh, yeah.  Right.  Thanks.  And thanks for the offer to help.  There aren't many guys like us left anymore."

I smiled and nodded, put my hand to my head like a salute or a tip of the cap, and waved as I got in my car.


So . . . the guy who hates the government and is voting for Romney is angry that the government hasn't fixed his problem.  The guy who's voting for Obama is clearing his tree out of the street.

This is the exact opposite of what conservatives say is happening.  Conservatives say that liberals are sucking the nation dry with entitlements, and that good Americans are self-sufficient (they built all this themselves).  And I think they really believe this.  They really believe they are completely self-sufficient, that they built their own past, present and future, and that it's liberals who are destroying their perfect world.

Weird.