Saturday, January 08, 2022

Dear David Bowie

by Dick Mac

Good morning, sailor!

Each time I type that I think of the childhood tune that seemed so risqué: “What do you do with a drunken sailor early in the morning?” What do you do with a drunken sailor? Remember drinking!  My goodness, what decades the 70s and 80s were.  Remember?  No . . . me neither, really.  But there are some memories, of course.

One night in the mid-1970s, I was home with my mother, which didn’t happen much at that time. I was going to watch the Grammys instead of sneaking into 1270 or The Other Side, places where a queer minor could drink and dance. I was never an awards show person, but you were going to be on, so I stayed home.  My mother said: “Oh, he sings that ch-ch-ch-ch song that I like,” and she decided to join me in front of the television.  Finally, you appeared on screen and she gasped.  “Oh my God!” She exclaimed. “What’s wrong with him? Is he sick? He looks dead!”

Well . . . you weren’t dead yet, but you looked pretty fucked-up! You were dressed impeccably, of course, but you weighed nothing and looked like you could just fold-up and expire at any moment. I think I remember you saying that you have little or no memory of that appearance. I believe it! You were a mess!

Anyway . . . that’s my seventies memory for today.

It’s your birthday again, and you still haven’t responded to my last five letters. Not an email, not a chat, nothing. I miss you.

There is no good news to share about the state of your city. This damned pandemic is still spreading, as we return to millions dead in the streets this Winter.  I’m certain you’d be up in the mountains if you were still in New York.  I assume you know that Iman sold the apartment and spends her time in Ulster County. You may not have sold the apartment, but I suspect you wouldn’t have been in the city the last two years.

Last night The Cutting Room hosted a David Bowie Tribute with a bunch of our favorite musicians and performers. We were supposed to go, but because of this damned virus we cancelled. We were supposed to be driving to Philadelphia at this moment for a tribute show there tonight; but pricessramsey is in Cleveland, and cavebat is in Riverdale, and shakeh is in Philadelphia, and helen2 is in Inwood, and I am in Brooklyn. We are not getting together to celebrate in person.

Yeah, we wanted to celebrate your diamond anniversary!  It’s today!  Your Diamond Anniversary! It sounds so elegant! Not elegant in an actual elegant way, sort of in that tacky elegance that diamonds represent. Still, it is a big deal. Seventy-five!

I didn’t see many people last year. I saw Tony a couple of times, and he seems well. Then the usual suspects, but no visitors from Europe, and no sleep-overs, and little travel.

A lot happened with you in this past year: the next career-spanning boxed set was released. “Brilliant Adventure” includes Black Tie, White Noise, Buddha of Suburbia, 1.Outside, Earthling, and hours… along with some outtakes, B-sides, and live recordings. I got the vinyl box from one of our mutual friends and it’s remarkable to get that many David Bowie records in one package.

They released “Toy”! Yup! It was finally released. Twenty years ago, the cool kids made sure I got a copy, so I’ve had those songs in rotation for a long time; but, most Bowie fans haven’t had those cuts.  I never understood why it wasn’t released.  Maybe you refused to give yourself permission to release your songs.  I guess that could happen in some weird legal situations with publishing rights and all that stuff I only pretend to understand.  Be that as it may, it’s been released.  I got the vinyl box set, which is six 10” records. Very fun!  Lovely package.  I think you’d have approved.  Maybe not!

It was announced that they are making a new version of Labyrinth.  I assume they will use new music, so it will have no relation to your version of the movie. I don’t even really think of this new project as having any relation to you beyond the obvious fact that you appeared in a version of it 35 years ago.  It’s like pretending Judy Garland and Janet Gaynor are somehow connected because they both made “A Star Is Born”! There is no connection; but people need to connect things.

Speaking of “The Star Is Born” movie, I had a fun thing come across my screen this year. About ten or 12 years ago, I was at a gathering at an apartment in  the Village. The host had a new boyfriend and he was the most tedious quean you could imagine, a total dullard. Not untalented or stupid, but boorish (and boring).  Anyway, he adored Lady Gaga, and we were talking about her songs and stardom. There was a unanimous feeling that she was a big star and had some good pop songs. Mostly we talked about her influence on young queer/gay/trans people and how important her message of acceptance was to the marginalized. You remember! She really was on the vanguard of the next phase of human acceptance. Then we talked about her influences and this tedious queen mentioned Freddie Mercury, and we all agreed about his influence on her act. Then I mentioned you, and her statements that you were a huge influence on her, and this quean says: “Oh, please! David Bowie is awful. He had no influence on her at all.” There was a bit of stunned silence in the room, some nervous giggles as he ranted and raved about her. That was the end of the conversation and I didn’t think about it again. I’m not a follower of hers, and it doesn’t really matter to me what that dullard thinks of you. Then a few months ago, a picture appeared on my screen of Lady Gaga wearing a backless gown, showing lots of tattoos, and right there on her side is a tattoo of the Aladdin Sane album cover. So . . . smart people know you’ve influenced everybody, and dullards are . . . well . . . dull.

I got a new job. It’s weird to start a job during a pandemic when you don’t actually see anyone in person. It is what it is!

Leah released Stylophonika, a very cool LP with the Kingston University Stylophone Orchestra, recorded at the Visconti Studio. Speaking of Leah, she has also written the book Blackstar Theory, The Last Works of David Bowie that will be published this year. She is brilliant! Did you ever meet her?

What else happened since we last talked? We made Juneteenth a national holiday!  Yeah!  Can you believe it?!?!? The Duke and Duchess of Sussex left royal life and moved to Southern California. He is Diana’s son, and she is an American he married a few years ago. A fantastic multi-part documentary about The Beatles was released.  I loved it. There’s a great scene of Paul jamming with John and Yoko, that totally demystifies and dismisses tall tales about their relationships. The weather has gotten crazy, but I know you didn’t really let the daily weather affect you (smart people don’t complain about weather); the issue has really been about climate change.  It’s gotten a bit out-of-hand. So far, there is no life on Mars, but we’ve got vehicles up there still driving around and sending back pictures and collecting samples. It looks like we might actually send people there some day.

A bunch of people died. Some of them you knew, and some of them might already be on your list for heavenly tea: Mick Rock, Wanda Young, Joan Didion, Kangol Kid, Bell Hooks, Michael Nesmith, Lina Wertmüller, Stephen Sondheim, Jean-Paul Belmondo, Charlie Watts, Chuck Close, Hiro, Biz Markie, Bunny Wailer, Chick Corea, Larry Flynt, Christopher Plummer, Phil Spector, and another doll, Sylvain Sylvain. Keep an eye open for them. I’m sure there are some fun conversations to be had among that crowd.

Do they play music where you are?  Do you ever get-together with other rock gods and jam? Do they all make you sing “Heroes”?  I wish I could see you sing “Heroes” again.  Hell, I’d settle for seeing you sing “Hickory Dickory Dock”!

We are supposed to go to England in March for a Holy Holy tour, but last night we concluded that we are not going to be traveling in March.  There’s a big Bowie Convention in Liverpool in June.  We have fancy tickets for that, but we don’t have travel plans yet. Nobody knows if it will be safe to travel then.  I am leery, but not closed-minded.

Tonight, Mike Garson is hosting an online David Bowie tribute concert.  We will be watching.  Last year it was fun so we hope for the same this year. Sure wish you could join us.

I guess that’s it . . .

When you have a moment, open the window and holler down the road to me, like you used to do. I miss that.

Remember . . . you can always come home and we can do all the old things!

Happy birthday, old man.

Everyone says Hi!